Santa's Little Helpers

Twas the night before Christmas

And all through the house

Not a creature was stirring

Not even a mouse

But the hovies are a-waiting

For midnight to strike

So they can go out

For a wonderful hike

Seems Santa is poorly

And just cannot cope;

And this band of brave doggies

Is his best and last hope

Lead dog is Riversong

A proud girl indeed

A perfect combination

Of power and speed

Her co-pilot is Skara

Her coat full of sheen

Her energy is endless

She’s youthful and keen

The rear guard is Tussock

An experienced old girl

Quite happy to go for

A clandestine whirl

 

Also in attendance

Is Talulah the flattie

Full of enthusiasm

But ever so scatty

And driving the sleigh on this

Night of all nights

Is pack leader Jan with the

Stars in her sights

But we need to get dressed

So we look the part

And that means some costumes

Before we can start

We need some tree branches

To go round the face

And plenty of sticky tape

To hold it in place

We then need a red nose

To show us the way

And glitter and tinsel

To put on the sleigh

Sadly this is where

We meet disarray

Dressing up hovies?

To hitch to a sleigh?

River is wanting to go right away

No way does she wish to stand still

She huffs and puffs as I put on her traces

Hurrying me with the strength of her will

And Skara’s decided the costumes are naff

And no longer wants to dress up

She wriggles and shuffles and rolls on the ground

And causes a major hold-up

Talulah is also so keen to move on

But like river she fidgets and jumps

Her vertical take-offs are something to see

But her energy’s escaping as trumps

Tussock is bored with the whole silly farce

And insists on going to sleep

I have to persuade her to shift off her butt

And the stress is making me weep

I take a step back and I look at the mess

And at what is attached to each hound

The branches are broken and chewed up in bits

And the parcel tape stuck to the ground

The traces are wrapped around both of my legs

And my arms are attached to my head

The thought of flying the skies just right now

Fills me with a deep sense of dread

I manage to wriggle a hand from the mess

And find a bottle of whisky

I glug a bit down and then with a frown

Realise driving is going to be risky

But suddenly a shout goes up through the night

And a streak shoots over the skies

Perhaps Santa is better and can do his own job

Or the elves have launched a surprise

But no! The colours are wrong and the reindeer too small

There’s a hint of some black and some white

The organised collies have seen our disorder

And now are the stars of the night!

Merry Christmas Everyone!