The Hairy Army

Casting time has come again

The dog hair’s on the move

It’s gathering up its armies

And hiding in every groove

The dogs are just a breeding ground

For soldierly recruits

Ignore them at your peril

As they polish up their boots

The dog shakes once and more come out

And scatter round the room

There’s no point trying to sweep them up

They’re faster than the broom

They march to all the corners

And hide up in their squads

Exterminating all of them

Is much against the odds

You do your best to make believe

They really are not there

You also do your very best

To pretend you do not care

But the morning comes when your patience snaps

And you stamp your foot in frustration

“This is my house” you shout at them

Not a bloody army station

War has been declared by now

As you approach a bloody fight

“It’s me or them” you calmly shout

And the dogs shake out of spite

The Dyson cleaner roars to life

And starts to gather its prey

Up and down the room it goes

Like a combine making hay

But still they hide in all the corners

Under sofas and the rugs

And now you’ve started disturbing them

They attack like bloody thugs

They turn from army to RAF

As they find their hairy flight

And float in front of your very eyes

And dance like Faery sprites

A new tactic must now be found

To tackle the hiding troops

And you unleash the Dyson nozzle

With a loud and victorious whoop

The suction is relentless

As they are pulled into the abyss

“At last!” you cry, “the house is clean”

And sit down in contented bliss

But unobserved behind you

A dog has shaken once more

And lots more hairy soldiers

Have been released upon the floor……