When grief first comes into our lives it is like an oversized cloak – it doesn’t fit,
And it suffocates us with its volume and weight, and the excess cloth trips us up as we try to go about our daily lives.
There are dressmaking pins still in the cloth causing sharp pain at unexpected moments.
The darkness created by its excess means we cannot see to find the pins or see where we are going
And so we blunder on in the darkness and our pain
Until one day the cloak flashes open and we see a chink of light.
We can stop and look around and see where the hurt is coming from
And gradually over time, we can sit down with the cloak to find the pins as we think about the one we have lost
We replace the pins with memories which we sew into the fabric
Over time, the cloak gradually shrinks and we can move through our daily lives a bit more easily
But we are still aware of it flapping around and catching on things,
Stopping us in our tracks.
Then one day, we realise we are wearing our cloak like a second skin
It fits us, it sits well on us, only chafing now and again
And all those memories we added to it bring us comfort now, bring smiles rather than tears.
